Adore

Loved,
those soft kisses on the forehead. 
Craved, 
those tight, good morning hugs. 
Missed,
the air that we breathed
Needed, 
your presence everyday. 
Adored, 
all of you. 


Karolina x

Short

The pain is still there, 
it always will be.


Karolina x

True colors

Breathtaking.
Raw and pure, 
laid there naked on the sheets.
Exposed,
bare, 
innocent. 
Sheer soul.
The most natural form, 
the real beauty.
The clearest it could be.
Monochrome, 
yet so colorful.




Karolina x

Home sweet home

First kiss in the moonlight, 
Speed up breaths, 
teansion,
heartbeat stops for a moment. 
Soft lips, 
that tasted like home.
You never knew you were missing them, 
until that first kiss.
Sweet aftertaste.


Karolina x

Fallin'

Let me taste your lips,
As they kiss mine hungrily.
Place your hands gently, 

all over my bare body.

Feel your breath on my skin, 

another sip of that bombay gin.

Your heart for a minute dies. 

Look deeply into my eyes, 

as you say those three words. 

And be aware from now on I'm yours. 

Karolina x

loneliness among people

Friends, 

family, 

strangers, 

parties, 

nights out, 

crowded places.
They go to every party there is.

So called attention seekers. 
Extroverts,  
yes. 
But dig deeper.
Sometimes there's a reason for that, 
thing you wouldn't think of in the first place. 
But let me tell you a secret.
Demons haunt you when you're alone, 
so going to all these places with people can be the best they can do to ease the pain. 
To stop their own minds for a moment. 
To escape their thoughts.



Karolina x

Perfect moment?

We live in a world where people keep waiting for perfect moment, 

we constantly say: I'll do that when ....

... I'll travel when I'll finish school, 

... I'll get a dog when I'll be 30, 

... I'll BE HAPPY when ... ?

When?

We're addicted to these conditions, 

conditions that only constrict us. 

Well, you can't do something because you didn't fullfill requirement you set for yourself?

Sounds like bullshit to me. 

We are our own prisoners. 

I admit, I get caught up in that too. 

I make way too many 'whens', 

but ...

What if they'll never come?

What if there's no perfect moment?

I guess we just need to take any moment we get and make it perfect. 

Karolina x

Mismatched

Out of place, 

that's what she felt. 

Misunderstood, 

was her reality. 

Wondering what was wrong with her?

Why couldn't she fit in?

Uniqueness run in her blood. 

Different, 

that was in her bones.  

Shooting star, 

her heart whispered. 

In that moment she knew. 

There comes a great suffer with uniqueness. 

Karolina X

Running

Why you do that?
Are you running again?
Aren't you tired?
Are you crazy?
They asked, yet the answer was more complex.

Running gives me freedom, 

gives me space, 

gives me time. 

I put on earphones and feel like no one can get me. 

I feel like I'm in a bubble. 

No interruptions. 

Just me, my running shoes and the road ahead. 

Music is just a background for my mind. 

I can organize everything, 

plan or even deal with problems. 

When I run, 

I don't care what I look like, 

wheather I'm a sweaty mess or not. 

I run like I'm 5 years old again, 

and the road is my playground. 

Karolina x

Biggest enemy

Demons,
Fed with self-doubt,
Stronger with every insecurity.
Haunt in the dark.
Unexpected,
Hit harder than you can take.
Eyes,
That's where they hide.
Exhausted,
But it's only the beggining.
Your own mind is your worst enemy.
Shatters your soul like a glass.
No glue is strong enough to seal broken pieces forever.

Karolina x

Sentimental

Years passed. 
Once again walkin' through those streets, 
streets that once saw all the secrets you keep. 
Buildings that held your tears and fights. 
Faces that hide those good, old memories. 
You see them. 
See it all.
But they aren't the same. 
Missing spark that once ignited. 
It's been replaced. 
The same spark in you has died. 
Suddenly you can't help it,
but feel like an intruder in your own city. 



Karolina x

nudity

Bare skin, 
the closest it could be, 
you thought you touched it all, 
but it's not real nudity. 
Exposure comes within soul, 
once it's uncovered you get the taste of bareness, 
there's nothing more touching than soul.
That is the closest you can get to someone. 
Naked mind, 
highest state of nudity. 



Karolina x

Extraordinary

Precious flower,
one of a kind,
a golden rose in a see of reds, 
unique.
Everybody wants it, 
everybody's desperate for that flower.
But once you get a taste, 
you feel the danger. 
This plant is hard to pick, 
but it's even harder to maintain. 
It's not easy to keep up with the precious flower.
Don't pick those flowers if you want normality. 
Because that's the opposite of what you'll get. 
Be aware. 
Moreover,
do not ever try to make them normal.



Karolina x

hopeless romantic

Fragile heart.
The amount of times it has been broken, 
it's uncountable. 
But every scratch is like a water, 
it helps it grow stronger, 
helps it heal. 
Yet the tragedy is quite clear, 
no matter how strong it grows, 
once it feels love again, 
it becomes fragile again.
Love is the drug, 
for that little fragile heart. 



Karolina x

Set free

A bird locked out of cage,
set free, 
fly,
whispered a voice inside his head, 
but, 
what does this freedom even mean?
An open door,
possibilities, 
but no plan.
Where to start?
How to spread this wings after you forgot how to fly?
How to wake up from this hibernation?
One step out of cage, 
feels unreal,
deep breathe to take it all in,  
the feeling of unknown.
There's something electrifying in the atmosphere.
New adventure, 
new chances.
Wings are spread, 
colors burst in the air,
as they make the first move.  
Fly,
a voice inside screamed. 
Excitement rushed through veins.


Karolina x

no regrets

If I died tonight,
I wouldn't change the past, 
nor would I erase mistakes I made, 
or bad memories.
I wouldn't.
If I died tonight, 
I would thank for everything, 
the bad and the good, 
the moon and the sun, 
the lie and the thruth.
The ugly made me appreciate the beautiful more.
See 
Life's too short, 
and regretting is unnecessary.
Every decision you make, 
everything that you do, 
all those small and big moments, 
they lead you to where you are.
Why regret things you once wanted, 
things that seemed like a good idea at a time.
They made you who you are.


Karolina x

Oh darling, no

When it comes to defining love, 
I will stand by Ted Mosby's words.
Love is different for everyone.
Love can be complicated, 
we are just humans after all, 
we give more than we take, 
we are taken for granted, 
that's just natural cycle of life. 
But one thing you shouldn't do when you love someone ...
... is change.
If the person you fell head over heels with wants you to change, 
it's not real. 
If you have to say sorry for who you are, 
for what you do, 
it's not real. 
If you don't feel like you're enough for them to love you back, 
it's not real.
If you can't do something because you're afraid of this person reaction, 
it's not real.
If you're missing opportunities in life because of this person, 
It's not real.
If you feel like you're held down, 
it's not real.
It's not how it's supposed to be,
After all true love can only make better person.
True love understands.
Gives you space, 
to be who you really are. 


Karolina x

The Loss

At first I felt nothing,
like it never happend.
First days were spent with friends,
I was never alone,
therefore there was no time to feel,
to feel the feelings that cumulated in me for days.
I honestly felt nothing.
Then I saw you,
you looked happy,
and that's when it hit me.
The feelings I've been holdin' inside me for all this time, 
they exploded.
I realized what happened,
and there was no turning back.
So many thoughts going on in my head at once. 
So many words I wanted to express,
but the pain made me numb, 
pain made me unable to write few words, 
so writting something longer to express the feelings, 
yes, it felt impossible.
I wanted to pick up all the pieces and understand.
but when I did...
I blamed myself for everything.
Making tea made me cry,
because I was trying to understand,
when did it all went wrong,
which day was the day.
Then I stopped blaming myself,
instead I blamed you.
I blamed you for not telling me what was going on,
I blamed you for not fighting,
I blamed you for not believing in me,
I blamed you.
But the blame is mutual.
It's OUR fault,
not mine or yours.
When I was aware of that,
I could move on.
But here comes the tough part.
Understanding that life happens can be painful.
Putting up with real life can be painful.
But coping with a loss of someone that was the most important person in your life,
someone who you made plans and dreams with,
this
this can be the most painfull thing.
But,
there's no rainbow without rain.


P.S.: This one is very personal, so don't judge, we all deal with life differently. I write. 


Karolina x